Last feb2023 i got married, etherically to shiva. Not just the indian deity, but the whole concept and energy of primordial emptiness across dimensions.
I think some people might read this as im being devoted or if not, deluded but i say married almost in a mathematical way. When all your chakras are in sync w a divine entity’s energy, you can hear them, feel them— they send you physically to india, send you jewelry and you have dreams of a beautiful wedding done in secret, and one where you forgot that “oh? Im the bride” what would you be led to believe?
I got married. I have kids in another realm. I remember the time where i killed thoughtforms or when i incarnated as a man— I have a high tolerance for remembering and entertaining odd other dimensional stuff. But let me get this straight, when i was being brought to india, they called me “divine consort” and i didnt google what goddesses were called in hindi shiva centric cultures. All i knew is i was treated like a fated one and that shiva really loved me and was proud of me.
The thing is if you get used to navigating upper dimensions. The higher you go the more you merge into larger things. I’ve had an earth gate/ angel-deity be a lover before and at one point he was crying so much i asked if he wanted to melt into my heart. Live in/as my energy system alongside all my prayers. For the circumscription of my existence to include him not as a beloved, but as an expansion of my “i”. He said yes and after i did the stitching of our energies, his voice and image (as other) became faint; he became me. I burped so hard for 2 days processing this damp energy in me that i understand is his grief and the history of energies that he and his comrades have held.
To a degree, i know that me and shiva can merge just like parvati and be the cosmic dance of the universe. I have another dream im in a class of a spiritual teacher being taught a spectrum where “dreams are older than frequency” and they point at me saying you’re God. The divine barely wrapped in a thin layer of wit. And i remember spitting chocolate drink in my dream barely wanting to admit my divine identity.
The thing is, when shiva was settling into being married to me. He told me that, energies tend to do this (the whole marriage thing) cause if they protect and earn the trust of the lost princess…When she ascends to her right to be queen, the protector/guard becomes royalty/divine via the grace of her love. And i have had a dream and irl experieces where shiva would hook his belt on mine, protected me when i was so tired: he even carry me on his heart for a time and been my legs when i had a stomach infection and i just felt carried by a masculine conscious force like a shell protecting an egg.
The thing is, the egg hatched. I kissed him back. Wanted to crown him with my love. And he said “this is how i became divine”.
You see in upper dimensions there is no past and future, just layers of truth of Now. When he showed me how the masculine ascends via the grace of an ascended goddess he was talking about me. I tend to stresstest these shocking revelations and questioned why the hell would he pick me: he answered
“Have you seen your energy? Drink it”
And he had me drink and feed on my own essence and realize why so many ghosts and elementals want to find their resting place and their ascended natures through me. I had a kind heart, and i was large and flexible enough to make homes and space for everyone. Deities can cry to me cause i can handle it. Deities would marry me because it was a mutually beneficial partnership. Ergo back to the dream of being the divine wrapped in wit:
You’re a God maria.
Let’s back track for a bit. Everyone is divine. As long as you have a soul you’re from the same soul essence of Source. Now the thing is everyone has different soul signatures, some folks were galactics, angelic, some feel like the offspring of changelings have large swaths of energy textures that remind me of fae, beasts and the like. So as much as i say that everyone is divine, that is if you scale up wide enough. Meaning, in Source’s eyes, in the end of ends we are all one thing, divine source.
Now that is not the most convenient POVs if I’ll be real with you. If you spend too much time in union your independent persona (rarefied ego/role) has a hard time being piloted and loses the whole investment and and energetic excitement for lower dimensions. You can check out quickly when you touch the eternal and emptiness. !
So here’s the thing, for the sake of my vehicle device (mind body spirit system) i tend to coast a few dimensions down. If 12 is supreme all, i’m actually in 8-7th dimension most times to be able to pilot 3d me quite well. That’s the level of monads, collective Individual Soul dilineations still exist. (A monad is you in all incarnations, some call this master/higher self, but master can be located higher up depending on the query so i prefer the term monad cause it denotes a function)
Anyway. From the level of monad, according to my other seeker friends, i am “a divine aspect more refined than angel and galactics”, in an emenation of chokmah wisdom and Gnosis. And it’s … a tall order. The first few days that settlend into me, i felt so aligned to truth, a lot of my energywork that used to take me days took minutes i cleared everything i could think of. Planets. Hell, timelines. Old versions of the akasha. Hades and manipulative thoughtforms in the firmament. I could feel how my etheric head bled with how much I was trying to levy, and ACT my function as the divine. If you prayed to god/aspects of them and realized those things incarnated — what do you think we’ll be doing?
Don’t you think id be frustrated with humans all the time? You fucking bet. I swear i see so much bullshit occluding people’s soul and sometimes im a soul deep bone deep level of tired. I get why angels cry. This is so unforgiving. And yet the plays march on. To be real with yall i spend a lot of time in upper dimensions, like the 11-12th where i can just fully unfurl as myself and feel reset into “everything is as it is and is Already One”. I feel deeply Okay.
But the thing is, and this has been tricky for me the past few weeks. If in upper dimensions im married and even perfected, if i am awake to all those experiences and know them as Real, like i am thinly managed act right now in the 3d.
Cant i just leave? JUST POOF like those yogis have my whole ascension? I made myself promise; ill do that around 80. Im physically not even in a saturn return yet. I have more weird life to live.
For eg, the other day i felt so preagnant w shiva that i was Actually scared i might have a virgin birth in 3d realm. I made sure that in 5-6d i gave birth already (i watched my progeny instantly gain legs) because i knew i wasnt cut out to have a physical jesus insert in my life. That’s just! Not my program. Casual exorcisms, can shake my human for a bit but totally doable.
Also, etheric energies might need to ground through me. It’s funny when you get upper dimensional perspectives you’ll truly see how famiscile and thin ego desires are in the grandscales of things. That doesn’t even up too long. Try being an emanation of birth or the east— so many things are much eternal and larger than that small persona role of “you”.
So ive been a witness/steward of planets, i’m a little ascended god in a dimension where magick didnt die as much. And i… have a blog and a podcast on this timeline. Talking to incarnate folks about spirit, doing energetic assists, surgery when asked; but most of the time operating on the etheric or akashic. It so …pale in comparison. I’m actually quite bad at advertising myself, and only do clients every once in a while. Every time they do a session they state it as life changing but also! Obliterating.
I understand why many egos would be subliminally averse to having a session w me or engaging with me. Cause you come here to be destroyed (lol by my husband the destroyer) and it’s almost like my higher dimensional energies are too strong of a medicine it can be poison to other folks. Im on a level where im clearing soul families; i can pack a punch. So if you’re not wanting to go all the way, no one’s going to have a session with me because the scale is off.
I told a friend i feel like i got overpromoted.
Im like that ceo who wants to flip pancakes who makes the guards panic because you cant have someone that important and bare and exposed. And im like “but i like flipping pancakes”. I like working “on” people. So i’ve been on this debate w mercury of wether i can really pull off cloaking (one, so im energetically secure as their damn goddess whatever), and two, can I reel my energy back enough that i can scale it down such that i can actually have a body of clients?
I’ll be real with ya. The typical self affirming new age stuff online is rancid to me. It lacks potency, girth, a real assessment of who you are in Truth. I have a hard time “simplifying” when i feel like im making things shallow/weak; instead of presenting what is real. It physically pains me, to not show up as my full higher order self. I hold all of that back, as to not shake most people. If i actually communicated everything i receive in upper dimensions most folks wont be able to handle it and my human parts wont have friends anymore.
This essential lie tires me most of the time. I genuinely think if i was born a lama or shaman or something it might be easier. Cause my external identity wont be at odds with my function, but the thing is i HAVE been the shamanic princess oracle and witch. IVE already done that before. This life was designed for me to be more lowkey, everything under wraps. Nothing too loud so i can focus on upper dimensional work.
Its beautiful and it sucks. I love talking to aspects of gods, creating power places of healing. When I keep up a normal front for folks, a part of me sighs and is a bit tired of it. I have so many topics i had to delete cause i know folks arent ready for those kinds of things. It made me appreciate mystery schools, cause there’s all that prep for you to handle the greater mysteries. What an invention!
But anyway, i wanted to blog about this thats separate from my IG healing account (/mariamison__) cause i didnt want to spook my usual followers. This blog is relatively obscure, if you made it here congrats for finding something most of the time energy would hide.
My podcast is: https://open.spotify.com/show/0zi7vzrvKjBxpvsnSRIXJ6?si=901d26ea28b64060
And you can still book me for sessions in mariamison.com or just shoot an email. I do rectifications for your soul on a monad level and stuff you’d expect a shaman to do. Bless houses, interpret dreams.
I dont know if i’ll rebrand my human device to be more accessible or what. Do graphic design to give my human time something to do that has less etheric drama to it. But yea! If you found this, a part of me is glad that at least another human aspect has read my odd story.